Monday 1 April 2013

Celeblog: Rita Ora - Not Right Now

Rita Ora (without make-shift beard)
Known mainly for her Ore-inspiring talent and beauty, Rita Ora is a woman hiding an Oreful truth from her past that she has kept to herself for so long; but now it is out. Under false authority, Rita Ora's dark past will now be revealed.

Rita Ora, 22, is currently a chart-topping Britosovan diva. She found commercial fame in 2011 whilst running a viral campaign which was concluded with her hit music video 'Hot Right Now'. This was not always the case for young Ora, however. She was not always a product of youtube fabrication like Rebecca Black or Loney Island. Raised in London, she lived in the shadow of the beardomaniac, Noel Edmonds and his House Party. At night, whilst sleeping, her father would regularly sneak into her room and carefully etch a healthy beard onto her face in permanent marker. This led to her missing a lot of school and, in turn, led her to music. In the spare time created by her father's hi-jinks, she found an affinity for the arts and literature. On many of these absent days, with a make-shift goatee (slightly faded by her own tears), Ora would make collages of her idols, Robson and Gerome, out of dulux colour samples. She would also create effigies of Edmonds out of mucus, body hair and nail varnish, but that is not something I will go into for libelous reason.

In her professional career she began as a songwriter and quickly became recognised for her striking aptitude. Working with monumental artists such as Baddiel and Skinner, The Ink Spots, John Barnes and Rage Against the Machine, a talent such as Rita Ora definitely has a lot more to give the world of music by giving music to the world.

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